Almost Finished, But…

I have only four half-blocks and one quarter-block remaining to sew into the last row. Then I will have only two long rows to sew together. Then I will be finished with this quilt top.

But. . .

But then I’ll be done! “Good!” you might say, “Brava!” even.

But. . .

“But then, what if it isn’t what I hoped it would be?” asks the Frightened Creative.

So I hesitate to continue. I have to push myself to finish. I offer myself little rewards with each seam or group of seams sewn. It is the Recovering Perfectionist in me that hides in fear.

“But What Is is already there,” explains the Compassionate Contemplate, “and you cannot (will not) change it, but it won’t Be unless you Are.” (I really don’t like her!)

Do you do this too? Do you sometimes stop working before the work is done because you fear that it will not be “good enough?”

How do you move beyond that fear?

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~ by Kimberly Mason on April 5, 2010.

10 Responses to “Almost Finished, But…”

  1. Its going to be beautiful !!!

  2. Don’t pay attention to negative people, they only bring you down. Is this project a bed quilt, or a wall quilt? I think it is going to be beautiful, I love the colors. I have lots of ufo’s, and as for starting something and not finishing, I used to do that with clothing, I threw more in the garbage than I care to mention.

  3. No, I don’t. I don’t have that fear. It will be what it will be. And this is beautiful!

  4. To a novice like myself this is spectacular! And to the accomplished sewer I am willing to bet they would feel the same
    way. It is just lovely my dear……so plow ahead and make us all
    proud! Blessings, Jonnie

  5. Yes, I do have this fear. I get over it using one of these various strategies:
    1) I put it away for a week or two.
    2) The fabric is all cut and won’t be good for anything else anyway, so I might as well finish.
    3) plain simple discipline. That, or I bribe myself with a cookie.
    4) I promise it to someone by a certain date (this strategy can be dangerous!)

    Having said all that, please don’t ask me how many UFO’s I have laying around….

  6. I freeze then walk away for one day, Kim. I ask myself why I’m afraid and I honestly and openly wait for the answer. This part sucks because the answer usually ain’t all trimmed out with flowers, bows and stuff. Sometimes I eat cake. Sometimes I drink wine. Well I always eat cake! slow smile. And I pray. One answer I get a lot is that I’m a journey girl and I don’t want the journey to end. Sometimes endings are like a small death. One is that need I have for reassurance and my lack of self confidence and so I think my stuff sucks. Then I pray more. Then I “shut up and man up” as we say around here. Or “don’t think just do.” Sometimes while crying. Honest. It alarms the crap out of the family when the tears are falling and I’m knitting or at the machine. But it happens. Snot happens.
    The Great Deceiver’s voice is fierce. Stirring fear in my life is his favorite past time. Telling me I’m never going to be enough is his favorite chant. I am refraining from a litany of colorful ugly names for him right here.
    Here’s the deal, Kim, my sweet beautiful friend.
    You are loved. More than you’ll ever ever comprehend. By those who walk this earth with you. And by your Heavenly Father. Hairs numbered, knitted in womb, all that jazz.
    You have the ability to do greatness. You are enough. Always and forever, you are enough. You bring more to the table than you will ever ever comprehend.
    Okay.
    I’m sitting beside you. Always. Big fat azalea filled love rolling your way.

  7. I just want to tell you that I think this quilt is exquisite. I love everything about it–the colors, the light center, the butterfly or hands offered up (looks like both!). What’s not to like or love about it? What is most important about this quilt is that it is your renewal, your rising. If a seam is slightly crooked or points don’t quite come together, meh! She rocks!

    As for your question, I don’t stop a project for fear of not turning out well. My challenge is to continue when I know that it is already not what I had hoped it to be. Usually I press on and learn to live with it.

  8. Sometimes it’s hard for me to finish a project. Not beause I’m afraid it won’t be all I thought it would be. It’s because I’m all about the challenge, and one the thrill of the challenge is gone, and the slogging to the finish starts, THAT’S when I tend to hop to anothe “challenge”. It’s probably a form of ADD, but it’s something I struggle with.

    Finish this. Think of it as thumbing your nose (or worse, he he) at the demon doubt. It it turns out it’s not all you wanted it to be, then use it as a stepping stone.

    Frankly, I am in awe of the beauty of the piece so far, and the personal symbolism. Are you afraid of completing it because that means you’ll be expected to continue creating & you’re afraid that maybe this is all your muse gave you? Balderdash! Shut up and sew, sistah!

  9. Wow – these are all GREAT responses! If I had something I was afraid to finish I wouldn’t dare stop now! I need all of you ladies on my cheer squad.

    As for myself – I’m more like Pat. Once the newness wears off I’m pretty much done & it takes a LOT of discipline to finish.

    • I really like the idea of bribing myself with a cookie….except for the fact that I’ve had four, count ’em, FOUR root beer floats in as many days so…

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